Happy St. Nicholas Day
christmas! the time in which Santa Claus invites his pal the Krampus to scare the crap outta little kids and take awesome motorbike rides
"At the pet store he picked out two painted turtle, each about as big around as a mayonnaise-jar lid. He bought them a large kidney-shaped dish that had its own little island, a plastic palm tree, so aquatic plants, and a snail. The snail, presumably, to bolster the self esteem of the turtles: “You think we’re slow? Look at that guy.” To shore up the snail’s morale in the same way, there was a rock. Everyone is happier if they have someone to look down on, as well as someone to look up to, especially if they resent both. This is not only the Beta Male Strategy for survival, but the basis for capitalism, democracy, and most religions."
“Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!”
“Stop saying that!”
When I taught sixth grade, after standardized testing was done, the school was going to show Harry Potter 4 over the closed circuit as a treat. Every kid I had had either seen it or wasn’t allowed to (those kids went to the library). So I showed them Princess Bride instead, which I had in my truck. Of the 120 kids, only 1 had ever seen it. I’d never seen the kids so pumped up. The all-boys class, generally packed with kids the administration thought of as disruptive or inattentive, all stood up as one during this scene, howling and clapping after previously shouting “no” when it looked like Inigo wasn’t going to make it. Best movie viewing experience of my whole life.
(Source: lockelamoras, via swegener)